A Polak wanted to join an amateur baseball team. The coach
looked him over and decided to give him a chance.
"I will give you three questions," said the coach. "If you
come back in a week and answer them all correctly, you're on the
team."
"Fair enough!" said the Polak eagerly.
The coach proceeded, "Here are your questions. First, how many
days are there in a week that start with the letter 'T'? Second, how
many seconds are there in a year? And third, how many d's are there in
'Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer?'"
Next week, the Polak came back, feeling all confident that he
knew the right answers. So again the coach said, "So how many days in
the week that start with 'T'?"
The Polak said, "Two!"
"Very good!" said the coach. And what are they?"
"Today and Tomorrow!"
"Hmm... OK," said the coach. "How many seconds are there in a
year?"
"Twelve!"
"Twelve? How did you come up with twelve?" The coach was
perplexed.
"Well," said the Polak, "there's the second of January, the
second of February, the second of..."
"Um.. OK," broke in the coach. "How many d's in 'Rudolph the
Red Nosed Reindeer?'"
"Oh, that is easy!" laughed the Polak. "Three hundred and
sixty-five!"
"WHAT?" cried the coach. "How did you get that figure?"
To which the Polak sang, "dee dee dee-dee-dee dee-dee...."
A Polak saw a priest walking down the street. Noticing his
collar, he stopped him and said, "Excuse me, but why are you wearing your
shirt backwards?"
The priest laughed, "Because, my son, I am a Father!"
The Polak scratched his head. "But I am a father too, and I
don't wear my shirt backwards!"
Again the priest laughed. "But I am a Father of thousands!"
To which the Polak replied, "Well then you should wear your shorts
backwards!"
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